Hiding Amaranth

Oooh man do I hurt today. Once again my body has somehow found and used all of these new muscles that I never knew that I had before and it has made walking and moving a little difficult today. I had my first baseball game last night of the year and SHOCKINGLY I didn't suck. At least, I didn't suck half as bad as the rest of the people on my team. I managed to make a couple of good plays AND had a decent hit. I realized though that my first few times up to bad I developed this fear of the ball. Well, at least a fear of HITTING the ball. There were so many good pitches that came right across the plate that I just stood there and watched come in past me. It was sad and I was making myself angry so I was kicking up dirt at the plate. But I finally forced myself to swing at one and I ended up hitting it somewhere far out in rightfield. NOT TOO SHABBY! But yeah, right now walking around is giving me the painful reminder of how out of shape I am. I think I need to find a baseball icon... *goes off in search of one*

edit: Meh... this one is OKAY... It'll do!

Heh... This made me smile.

Alright, ten to three and yes, I am still awake. I am tired though... I would like to sleep soon.

A lot on my mind lately... I'm so confused about everything right now. Lets just say that there are a LOT of things going on with me... physically and emotionally that I don't completely understand and I wish I did. Because frustrations are a bitch.

I do it every year and I know you must hate me for it by now, but yes, Saturday is that stupid stupid day and it really makes you feel like a pretty big reject. Thank you hallmark! You're SWELL. ;) I get to spend it completely alone this year as my roommates will be completely cleared out from the house. The quiet I will be looking forward too... no more Sue muttering things to me from her room like I have an idea of what she's saying to me. Anyways. Saturday will be a very quiet day. A line came to mind to me today that COULD have inspired a potential poem, but I'm not going to be that emo. .... BUT this was the line I came up with. "A day so warm and yet still cold" - see?? the START of something emo. But really... February is a stupid month to have this. It's in the middle of the winter. It's COLD.

....

I really need to sleep soon...

It's history in the making.

And I'm fucking sick of it already.

I am personally disgusted with the response that America's new President Obama has received from Canadians.

A constant changing facebook status that I have been seeing this week from one person on my friends list has been of the following nature:

"Jeffrey it was nice to hear FORMER President Bush who is now out of The White House."
"Jeffrey is the phrase FORMER President Bush has a nice ring to it."
"Jeffrey wishes that Canada could have a leader like Barack Obama."

Seriously? Go live in the States. If you're going to be that fucking obsessed with it, get out. I was listening to the radio yesterday and there were reminders at every commercial break, "Obama was sworn in today. Inaugeration at the White House today. Obama. Obama. OBAMA." Even today there was a SONG. A SONG. Dedicated. To him. And they have taken this song and inserted clips from his speech into the song. You know. Like how they did with Titanic? And when they had sound clips from the movie inserted into 'My Heart Will Go On?' Do you remember that? I DO.

WHAT has he fucking done? I think it is a great accomplishment that he was elected into office. I think that is fantastic and it shows the progress that America has made as a country in electing a Black president. I applaud him for that. But hey. HEY. HE'S THE AMERICAN PRESIDENT PEOPLE. I was watching the news and there were chiors gathering together in some town who were going to be singing hymns to celebrate him coming into office.

WHY.WHY.WHY.WHY.WHY.WHY.WHY??

I don't. Get it. Why?? He is NOT our President, NOR do we have a President. It's pretty sad that American politics have turned into some sort of show for Canadian's. Obama has fallen into a group that is like celebrities that we look to and admire. People on the news were worrying the NIGHT before the inaugeration and WONDERING what his wife was going to WEAR. WHY!? Why does it fucking matter? It has fallen in the same sort of class as the Hilton's or the monarchy.

I'm not against him or anything but really? We need to focus on our own government and the crap that's going on with them right now. Because that's exactly what it is. But I'm not really one to judge our own government.

When Obama actually STARTS to do things and change the country, then I will give a damn that's he's the American president. Lets focus on our own crumbling government please.



EDIT: Just in case I need my point reiterated? I type in 'Michelle Obama' and this was the first thing that I got up on a google search engine.
http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/style/37874579.html?elr=KArksc8P:Pc:UHDaaDyiUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aUU

Callie and Sloan FTW! Mark needs someone instead of being a big slut all the time. ...Even though I love that he's a slut.

The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they've printed."

1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicize those you intend to read.
3) Underline the books you LOVE.
4) Reprint this list in your own LJ so we can try and track down these people who've read 6 and force books upon them ;]

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare (Sonnets, Romeo and Juliet, Hamlet, Macbeth, Twelfth Night, The Tempest) - William Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Happy Guy Fawkes Day/Bonfire night to all!

I'm disappointed that I didn't get to set fire to any effigies this year but alas! There is always next year!

I THINK I was a little bit rude to Sue this morning and I don't even feel bad about it. I'm glad that I said something to her, finally. I think I scared her. She hid in her room from me all morning. *evil laughter*

The heart tore open; Flat lined. 

I had an interesting night with mom tonight - interesting, but good! She was supposed to go out for dinner to celebrate my aunt's retirement, but of course it's for my crazy aunt who she doesn't really like so she didn't want to go alone. So she made up an excuse/lie that would pass for me being allowed to go with her so that she wouldn't be by herself at this thing. Which was ok by me because that meant that I got a free dinner out of the situation.

So my stupid aunt told us to meet them all at Jack Astor's for 7. So I drive my mom and I all the way out to Whitby, which is about a 15-20min drive on the 401. So we get into the restaurant and the place is packed. The Jack Astor's is right beside this huge complex centre where there is an AMC threatres. So around 7:00 the place is getting VERY packed with people doing various things at this place. So we get in there and ask if there has been a reservation for this thing. They say no. We were told that we could walk around the restaurant to see if we could see them - annnnd we didn't. So we called my dad a few times to make sure we were at the right place and we were... So mom and I took off and we drove out to a Kelseys and had dinner together. And it was really fun. She had two glasses of wine while we were waiting (on an empty stomach) so by the time our waiter came around to take our orders she was in a great mood. Our waiter was really nice - and VERY cute. We named him Derek. We have no idea what his actual name is, but we thought that he looked like a Derek. All in all? It was a good night. Mom and I didn't have to see the crazy aunt and had a good dinner. I don't think I've ever gone out for dinner with just me and my mom before - usually it's someone else with us too. But fun! :S

Wow. So. I think I realized today that if I didn't post soon that by this weekend it will have been two weeks since I last posted on here - and for me? That's way too long. I've fallen behind on everyone's posts, so I'm sorry that I haven't been able to keep up.

Good news!

My last research paper is finished and handed in and the only thing that I have left to do now is my last paper for my Fantasy class, which is due on Tuesday and not that big, so I'm not that worried about it!

I've applied to a few jobs for this summer and I found some more on the internet last night, so I hope that I can hear from them soon!

I really want some mini eggs right now...

Katy Black is coming over tomorrow and we're going to bake some cookies and drink tea! Because we're cool old ladies like that! And I've rented Becoming Jane and we're going to watch that and enjoy the loveliness that is James McAvoy! (Or Mr. Tumnus!)

This school year is almost finished and then it's summer time! :D

Bad News!

I have realized that I have to be the most gullable person IN THE ENTIRE WORLD.

My parents came up today, which was really great that I got to see them! They came with a bag of goodies for me, including some delicious Easter chocolate and left-over food/cake from last night's Easter at my grandmother's. I've already devoured the pastizi's that my aunt left for me! They didn't stay very long, but I'm still really happy that I got to see them today! I'll be home for the weekend in just a matter of a few days so I'm very excited for that as well.
I've been writing my essay today and I'm at 2000/3000 words and I really hope that I haven't run out of things to talk about and I hope that what I have written is making sense. It's this feeling that I've been getting with most of my essay's lately, that I'm just not making sense with anything that I'm doing or writing. I feel so scattered sometimes. I just remember a different feeling with papers last year - they felt so much tighter and put together, whereas these just feel so loose... I don't get it. Maybe I'm still doing fine. Time will tell when I hand it in and get it back. I kind of wanted to finish this essay today, so I'm leaving this as a short post. But I really just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Easter and that I hope the bunny was good to you all!
My bunny brought me Scrabble! ;) lol!

I gave in! I got bored enough to do it - mostly because I'm in class too! ;)
And it's in pretty easter colours - so you better like it. Or else.

Everybody did that really cool meme - but I really just don't have the patience for it right now, but it looked like a lot of fun!

I have proved to myself once again that the world shocks the hell out of me some days. I was coming home from class and I went to sit down on a seat in the shuttle bus, but when I got onto the bus I was behind the driver who was walking towards the back of the bus to throw something out in the garbage. I'm a cool kid. I usually like to take the back of the bus - I can't explain it, it's the same reason why I always prefer the back seats of the classroom. So yes, I was going to go to the back, but realized that the bus driver was blocking my way to get to the back. He was a very large driver and I didn't really know which way to turn because either way it didn't look like we were going to be getting in either direction and the guy behind me had taken the seat that I had my eye on... So I had an awkward moment where I didn't really know which way to turn and I took a seat just off to the side so that I was out of the way and also had a seat.

The next thing I know the bus driver is sitting in the seat next to me. Not saying anything. Just sitting there. I was like "... ... ...uhm.... So hey, if you want I could drive the bus for ya! ....*awkward pause*" He told me I couldn't drive the bus because he was sitting next to me and then he got up and sat in the drivers seat again. I just... didn't know what I was supposed to do, what I was supposed to say. It was just one of those really awkward moments for me.

Again. When I was walking home after switching buses and on the last leg of my trek home there was a car that I could see was wanting to turn into the road that I was about to cross and probably into the McDonalds that I was walking by. So I stopped walking and let him go because I didn't want to get in the way or block any other traffic while he waited for me to cross (not that I'm a slow walker or anything). As the car is going by me I see them rolling down their window and I start thinking, "Oh god... what now?"
He rolled down the window on the passenger side and called out thank you to me and then kept on driving.
I thought that was pretty decent of them and it really sort of surprised me. Not many people would do much more than perhaps wave as they go around the corner.

So one random and one pleasant surprise. The random shouldn't surprise me that much, because they're more common than the pleasant kinds of surprise.

I stole this from wickedgarden_ facebook! It looked like fun and I wanted to do it.

Alright. You KNOW that I'm bored and procrastinating when I start to document my day... I was alone. I had fun.

I find I've been keeping up more with facebook that I have been with livejournal lately. So that either means that this place just isn't on my mind or that I have found a better way to procrastinate and I am slowly turning into a creeper. Yes? Maybe? You can decide.

I just got back from seeing The Other Boleyn Girl and I have to say that I have been left feeling particularily odd and freaked out by that movie. Disturbed. That's the better word. I knew what was going to happen prior to seeing the movie, but actually seeing it? Made me feel a little sick to my stomach and I think I've found a new fear. Dying of beheading. That has to be one of the worst ways to go... Do you ever have that feeling like you know what's going to come next and just because of that you don't want to do what you know will lead to that moment? That's how I feel beheading will be like. You're standing on the top of a bridge, staring down at the water below and you're supposed to jump in. It's that momentary fear of "Oh God, what if I don't actually make this?" - it's like that. But it's not momentary. You wait for death. For the ax to cut off your head.
Ugh, it makes me shiver.
But yeah. Not a bad movie. Fairly historically accurate, despite the sympathies twisted with which character you're supposed to feel sorry for. And I think that's the first movie I've seen with Scarlett Johansson in it - so she's not bad for acting either. I feel like I need to watch a positive movie now though to get over that... It's not bad, it just really kind of affected me more than it probably should have.

This time change nearly killed me today. I hate the farmers. The spring one has to be the worst idea ever. Loosing an hour of sleep? Some people value that!

I really love how I can sit down at my computer with the full intention on doing my homework and researching for my paper when the thought comes to my mind that I should check my facebook, update my many games that I have going on scrabblous. Then I open up my word document so that I can write down any quotes that I might want to use or points that I want to keep in mind for when I got to write my essay  - then I think that I haven't checked my livejournal in a while, so I signed on, checked friends pages and now have decided that it's been a while since I've posted and that I should give an update.
That's just about a half an hour in my mind. Don't ever wish to spend any longer than that in here, it's gets pretty crazy at times...

First day back to classes today after what seemed like a VERY short reading break. That was not a week. I think the only thing I'm going to miss was sleeping in... I really start to value that after a while. I think my professor had missed us over the break because he was in fine form today with his jokes - there were seriously tears in my eyes I was laughing so hard at him. It's one of those you have to be there type things because if I type it down it really wouldn't sound as funny as it was being there in class.

I just got an e-mail from the library telling me I have books to pick up... so I suppose that is a sign that I should get back to my essay note making, no?  Sigh.

It has been a long past couple of days, but still a lot of fun!

I got to see my mum for the first time since Christmas, which was so awesome. I surprised her at her work in Toronto with a coffee and a really good cookie from Timmothy's (the good one's that have the piece of a toblerone bar in the middle!). She was floored when I walked into the office, just staring at me before she literally jumped up from her desk and nearly knocked me over with the huge hug that she gave me. And once she let go of me she hugged me a second time and she looked like she was going to cry. We talked for a bit and I lucked out that her boss was going out of the office for lunch that day so my mum also got to go out for lunch with me, which was nice because I wasn't expecting to be able to spend as much time with her as I did. I thought I'd might have twenty minutes or so before I had to leave, but I spent about two hours with her. When I left her I was fine and I got on the subway, went shopping for a while - but it didn't really hit me until the car ride home. We were driving over a bridge and I looked out across the lake. I knew that just across the lake was home. That was it. I was so close. But I'm still so far away from it. Just looking at the water and knowing that made me so upset. Thinking about it still makes me upset. I just need a good solid week at home. The next time I'm going is the weekend after Easter and I think I'm going to go home on Thursday night right after my last class, forget about my Friday classes and not come home until the next Monday night. 4 more weeks to go.

It's been a couple days since I last posted, so I figured that I'm due.

My reading week has officially started and I took a bit of a relaxing evening tonight. For some reason I randomly got 'Part of your World' stuck in my head and decided that I wanted to watch The Little Mermaid. I love that movie. It's so cute and it's such a classic. Old time Disney animation, that's where it's at! I've been also playing a bit of Kingdom Hearts with Torri and I've just finished in the Agrabah level and now I desperately want to watch Aladdin! It's funny because you can kind of anticipate what is going to happen in the games if you are familiar with the movies. Like at the end when you have to fight Jafar, he's captured Jasmine and he's got the Genie on his side. So you defeat him once and you start thinking, "OK... it is SO not this easy... he's going to wish to be a genie..." And then guess what? He wished to be a genie! I still love it though.

I get to see my mum this week and I am so excited about that! I don't know how much time I'm going to have to see her, but it's better than going until after Easter.

But I'm getting tired and I'm going to go sleep - I might post again with more exciting stuff tomorrow. Or... later today... riiiiight....

Ugh, I am dying. Something in this house is killing me slowly. My eyes have been watering most of the day and I keep sneezing - but here's the kicker. I have NO idea what is doing this to me. Sitting in the living room was fine because it wasn't bothering me then, but once I leave there and come into my room it starts all over again. I have a feeling that it might be from something coming from the basement. Something smelled really bad from there the other night and I could smell something coming from there again today... :P

I finished my beast of an essay and handed it in today. But I didn't get that feeling like I usually do when I hand in something that I've been working on for a while. That "Oh, thank God it's done" feeling. I just feel like I can take a couple of days to relax right now and not have to do much work until the weekend.
READING BREAK STARTS SOON! Sleeping in for a week? Hells yes.